Good Grief

Driving home a few minutes ago with my stepdaughter, she said "Mom, I need to tell you something about my real Mom and about you." I said OK and listened to her tell me that when she visits her real Mom she and her brother cuddle with their mom (I am assuming at night before bed) and that her brother always rushes to get to their Mom first and she has to just go to bed after not getting enough cuddle time. She went on to tell me that when this happens she sneaks out of her bed early in the morning and goes to cuddle with her Mom without her brother there.

It made me really sad to think that this sweet little girl just needs to be loved. She isn't loved enough. She wasn't loved enough and she wants it. Craves it.

She then told me that she wanted to know if it was OK for us to have cuddle time because since Zoe is his Heaven, she needs to be my little girl and love me.

I almost lost it. She knows that I need more love right now too and she has always known. She has always been so sweet about Zoe and she includes her in prayers and special family moments. This perceptive little six year old who makes up funny songs while she draws pictures of our family. Her pictures always include Zoe.

Today I received a letter from the school asking permission for our kids to join a club for grief. It is for children who have moved, been through divorce or a death. It gives them a chance to talk about it and deal with it. I was not aware there was a program such as this and I was immediately thankful for the referral. The kids start this program tomorrow.

Here is a photo from the very first visit that I ever had with Keira. I remember that she watched me put on my make up, she picked out my jewelry and was utterly delighted to get a little squirt of my perfume before we left to go to a family get together. This was two years ago, and MY how she has grown and become so smart!